Granny phone chat free sex talk montreal

Posted by / 21-Jan-2018 11:02

Granny phone chat free sex talk montreal

The ideas on this page will help you come up with a more creative greeting for your machine.

Kazuo Hashimoto (Phonetel), was the first answering machine sold in the USA.

If you have a wrong number, push 3 on your touch tone phone now. You jusht had to call and call until shummbody got home. Our operators do not exist at the moment, but if you wish to make a contribution, please leave your name, number, and the amount of your bequest at the sound of the beep, and something will get back to you shortly. The machine answering this message is connected to a 5000 volt power supply, and a relay which is wired to this small kitten. Please leave your name and number, and after I've doctored the tape, your message will implicate you in a federal crime and be brought to the attention of the FBI. Fortunately resurrections and divine revelations do tend to occur from time to time, so leave a message and we'll let you know when the next miracle occurs. (Break a few small twigs; big scream.) Please leave your name and number and we'll get back to you as soon as it is humanly possible. (Drawling granny voice:) Way back inna winner of fifty-two, we didn' have fanshy gadjets like no ansherin' machine. (Narrator's voice:) There Dale sits, reading a magazine. The bathroom explodes into a veritable maelstrom of toilet paper, with Dale in the middle of it, his arms windmilling at incredible speeds! Your five dollar donation to get George Bush re-elected in all 50 states will automatically be charged to your phone bill. (To the tune of "Heartbreak Hotel" with appropriate music:) I just left home baby, I'll be out fer a spell, and if you don't leave a message baby, you can go to BEEP (To the tune of "Smells Like Teen Spirit" by Nirvana:) Hello, Hello, Hello, Hello, Hello, Hello, No one's here, No one's home, Leave a message, At the tone. (Pause.) I mean, he can't come to talk to you right now, but if you leave a message after the, umm oh, the uhhhh... If you want to leave your name and just a message, press star, press 6, ask for extension 4443, then leave your name and message.

All of this button pushing doesn't do anything, but it is a good way to work off anger, and it makes us feel like we have a big time phone system. Now, shum people, dey shay dey don' like 'em, but I shay it'll shave you a lotta trouble if you jusht leave a meshage. You know what I hate about answering machine messages? I mean, all they really need to say is, "We aren't in, leave a message." That's why I've decided to keep mine simple and short. Your help will enable us to bring these delightful creatures back from the brink of fantasy and find them suitable positions in the forest product industry. (Sound of a kitten meowing.) If you hang up before you leave a message, it will complete the circuit and fry the kitty. This is not an answering machine -- this is a telepathic thought-recording device. You jusht had to call and call until shummbody got home. Don't feel stupid, Its no big fuss, Leave a message, You can reach us. If you want to leave your number and the time you called, please press star twice, spin in a circle, press 1 twice, talk loud and BEEP.

And if you can make your message rhyme, We'll call you back in half the time!!!!! So if you'll leave a message after the tone, I'll get back to you as soon as justice is served. Stand by at the tone to give coordinates and destination of incoming bogey. If you do not respond, this unit will assume incoming, non-urgent. This is Nonoxynol-9, the personal and private telephone number of Mikhail Vladivostok Gorbachev, General Secretary of the Supreme Council of the glorious Communist Party of the Union of Sovjet Socialist Republics, Commander-In-Chief of the Combined Armies of the Proletariat Peoples of Russia, First Citizen of the Order of Lenin, Supreme Patron of the Soviet Institute of Literature and Domestic Sciences, President of the Soviet People's Council of Peace and Happiness and Captain of the Kremlin B Squash Team. After the tone, think about your name, your reason for calling, and a number where I can reach you, and I'll think about returning your call. If you are calling to collect a student loan, gambling debt, or other obligation, please press 1 and hang up now. Due to the large number of complaints regarding the length of our previous answering machine message, we made a few changes. If you want to leave a message, please wait for the tone. I am your host, Fred, and I will be with you for the next 20 seconds. Leave yours with us, and we'll try to fit it in, given programming constraints. Please leave your name phone number and a brief message at the tone. Your voice patterns are now being digitally encoded and stored for later use. (Hum the "Dragnet" theme...) (Jimmy Buffett's "This Hotel Room:") "I ain't home, I ain't home, you better leave a message 'cause I ain't home." (Kazoo band playing "Thus Spake Zarathustra":) Thinking you were making an ordinary phone call, you have instead reached... (Loud heavy-metal music in background; raspy voice:) Hello, this is the executioner. (Noble, aristocratic voice:) Yes, one million dollars COULD be yours, IF you leave your name, telephone number, and the reason WHY you want to join the ranks of The Rich and Famous! (Screams in the background.) We're busy being cleaned by the light of eternal truth right now, so if you leave your name, number, and a brief message, we'll get back to you at the end of time. Please leave your name and number, and we'll get back to you.

You are dazed, bewildered, trapped in a world with no time, where color collides with sound, and shadows explode. This is no ordinary answering device; this is "The Twilight Phone" Hello. Here comes the beep, how I hate that beep, it's so cheery sounding. You have reached the Strategic Air Command Nuclear Missile Storage Facility. At the tone, please leave your name, number, and target or list of targets, and we'll launch as soon as we can. If you are selling any product or service, or requesting charitable donations, please press 2 and hang up now. If you want to leave your name and number, please press pound, press 3, then dial your name, then press 6 and dial your number. Once this is done, our computers will be able to use the sound of YOUR voice for literally thousands of illegal and immoral purposes. However our staff of professional extortionists will contact you in the near future to further explain the benefits of our service, and to arrange for your schedule of payment. All our agents are busy undermining the governments of the Earth and cannot come to phone at the moment. Joe can't come to the phone right now because he's DEAD! If this is Ross Perot, Bill Gates, Michael Jordan, or Princess Di, just leave your VISA number and expiration date, and we will definitely get back to you! (or) (Rod Serling imitation:) You're dazed, bewildered, trapped in a world without time, where sound collides with color and shadows explode. (Theme music and voice from Alfred Hitchcock Presents:) Good evening.

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